Thursday, August 6, 2009
Im in Control
My name is Lauren and Im a control freak.
There I said it. I admit it. I apologize for it. Well, maybe.
How can I apologize when Im always right? When I always know the best way to do things? When I know my children better than anyone in the world?
There is no hope.
Last weekend I valiantly sent the children upstairs to have Daddy help them get dressed. I told them they could wear whatever they wanted - "Have fun!" I belted as they scampered upstairs. Mike has chosen their clothes only a handful of times in the 3.5 years since they were born. I felt proud, loose...letting go of the reins was easy!
Minutes later, I walked past the bedroom door and made a few tweaks to the outfits he had laid out.
Ok, maybe a little harder than I thought.
The thing is I know I need to change. I want Ella, Drew and Tyler to be confident - they need that little voice inside that tells them they can do anything. That voice comes from hundreds of experiences of accomplishment. If I don't loosen up, all they'll hear is their crazy mother correcting them.
Geesh, when did I turn into that?!
Im working on it. Im trying every day. No coincidence that they will be starting preschool in a few weeks - hours without me? Another adult in charge of my kids?
I know they will be fine. It's me Im worried about, wish me luck!